Habits
I often talk about habits and how important it is to get busy forming good ones. Sometimes it’s in the context of the question: Why save when you have debt? Because saving is a habit, and the longer you take to form the habit, the less likely you are to get good at it. Sometimes it’s in the context of exchanging bad habits with good ones. This is a challenge I sometimes give my couples, and it works really well to bring home the point.
Habit can be your best friend or worst enemy. Get in the habit of whipping out that credit card every time you see something that makes your juices flow and you’ll be neck-deep in debt FOR FRICKEN’ EVER! Get in the habit of saving the money you want to spend on an indulgence before you go shopping and you’ll always be in the black. Wow! What a concept.
One of the things that can get in the way of forming a new, positive habit is not being clear about what you want to achieve and how you’re going to go about doing it. If you’re planning on tracking your spending, you need to have how you’re going to do that clear in your mind – what tools you will need, when you will do it == and you need to WRITE IT DOWN.
Focusing on one habit at a time is more effect than splitting your energies in several directions. Once you’ve established the habit, you can then look for a new positive habit to establish. The idea is to make the thing you are doing – the habit you are establishing – so ingrained that not doing it isn’t even an option.
It’s useful to recognize the obstacles that may interfere with your habit formation as long as you don’t use those obstacles as your excuses for not continuing to establish the new habit.
The Japanese have an interesting approach to forming new habits. Kaizen focuses on continuous but small change, which helps to maintain momentum. So instead of saying you’re cooking all your meals at home from here on in, you pick one night a week when you’re going to cook and you stick to it, until The Wednesday Night Home-Cooked Meal is a habit. Then you add another day. And another. And another, until you’ve reached your final goal.
Rumour has it that it takes 21 days to form a new habit. I happen to take longer. I’m a slower burn. So I think the amount of time it’ll take before you move to the next level is dependant on your personal resistance to change.
The process of forming a habit is easier if the habit activity has a reward associated with it. A work out is rewarded with endorphins, a study session with a great grade. But the reward doesn’t make a habit. That comes with repetition and the neurological pathway. That’s why the more you practice piano, tennis or reading, the better you get at it.
It takes determination, hard work and self-discipline to develop a good habit. I once heard it likened to putting a satellite into space: at first it requires a huge amount of force and energy to get the satellite into space, but once there, it moves effortlessly.
Aristotle said:
“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then, is not an act, but a habit.”
So what habits are you working to form? What’s your best habit and what did you have to do to make it a habit?
Tags: habits
September 1st, 2008 at 6:00 pm
After I started working full time, I began to realize that my activity level was being compromised (summers were spent working outdoors doing manual labour) by my desk job.
It took me awhile to come to that conclusion (I thought running for the bus counted for something, at least!), but in June, I decided enough was enough and I needed to get much healthier.
My best habit is exercising regularly. I don’t always feel like it or want to, but it has become my habit and it feels strange when I don’t exercise at least 4 times a week. In fact, now I’m looking at the possibility of joining group classes, instead of trying to do it all on my own, since I feel I’m at a better stage (I could actually complete a class now :P). It required perseverance to get to this point, and every so often I get caught up in other things and don’t make time for the exercise. But in the end, I’m returning to it, unlike past times when I would exercise consistently for a few weeks and fall off the bandwagon.
Another great habit I have is recording expenses. If I’ve spent a lot of money in one day, having to write it down offers me a wake up call and reminds me of what my goals are and where the amounts fit. (ie: I’m going on a trip soon, and was picking up some basics, and each time I swiped my card, it was adding up - it was all budgeted for, but it was adding up quickly (”$25 here”, “$15 there”, “$40 for this”, “$7 for that” sort of thing). Without my spreadsheet telling me how much of my trip money I’ve spent already, I wouldn’t necessarily realize, as I don’t base my spending on what’s in my account - it’s based on the spreadsheet and my plans for how the money gets spent!
As for a habit I’m working on … that’s to increase my healthy eating. I need more fruits and vegetables in my diet, but that’s a slow effort for me. I’m like the picky toddler who fights back against vegetables! This one I’ve been working on for a few years, and I’m only yet able to eat something like 8 or 9 things without any incidents, but that is still better than when I refused to try new things. Everything takes time, and the vegetables/fruits I can eat now were directly related to trying things again even though I didn’t like them and forcing myself to continue. (Still don’t love or even enjoy them, but I know I need to eat them!)
September 1st, 2008 at 6:39 pm
Wow! Talk about hitting the nail on the head. Most of today I have been pondering “Why save when you have debt?” and look - you answered it! I could not justify why i would be putting $100 away, and not putting it directly on my debt. Thanks for another wonderful post!
September 1st, 2008 at 7:14 pm
Habits are incredibly powerful! I am glad you brought it up.
Excercise is a habit I “WISH” that I had formed young. I have tried swimming, jogging, the gym, biking… and every time I get a good groove on something throws me right back to the start (injury, schedule change, really bad weather) and for whatever reason that FEW days of upheaval destroys all the good feelings about excersise that I had built up. And getting started again is as hard as it was the first time. It’s just an excuse and I know it in my bones.
The reality is, that if it is lower on my priority list, then I am willing to employ less effort to make it a habit! And I am fairly healthy, even with my fairly mellow activity levels, so I don’t press myself.
On the other hand saving $$ for the unknown is very high on my priority list (as is not paying interest –oooh how I hate giving my money away for nothing) so it is easy for me to put out a bunch of energy in paying attention to the money - and a habit is formed easy as pie! The quick calculations of what it REALLY costs me squelches those passions for stuff pretty quick.
Some habits are great for lazy people like me… and frugal too! Honestly it’s way less effort to grocery shop once a week with a list and cook at home than it is to got through the whole ordeal of eating out! ugh… getting everyone ready, making decisions about where to go, driving there (gas-$), deciding what to order, stressing about the cost, waiting for the food, dealing with the tip and then driving home and still having time to go through the evening routine. It’s just so much time, money and effort for very little reward. Of course it helps immensely that my husband has made a HABIT of cleaning the kitchen if I cook dinner!!!
My favourite habit is checking your posts, they are always inspiring and informative
September 1st, 2008 at 7:28 pm
I did really well creating the habit of exercise, especially while I was on maternity leave from work. It was a challenge to figure out how to fit it in and stay consistent once I returned to work, but I did it.
Unfortunately, it only take a small pause to break habits too. I hurt my back in April while training for a 10K race, that really slowed me down. Now I need to “re-focus” and make that a habit again.
One thing that worked for me when I first was working on that habit, I kept a calendar page on my fridge and I wrote down what I did for exercise each day. If I didn’t workout, I simply put a big X thru that date. Those red Xs were a good way to make me workout. If I saw too many of them, I felt guilty. I think I better get my calendar back out…
On the financial end, I started an automatic savings plan in January which transfers money into 2 ING accounts for different purposes. I’ve been very proud of myself for saving more than just for my retirement.
September 1st, 2008 at 9:27 pm
What’s your best habit Gail? Are you working on a forming a habit at the moment?
It’s a great feeling when a habit you’ve been working on becomes a necessary part of your day and you know you’ll never go back. I’m pretty good at exercising regularly and when I don’t, I don’t feel like myself which forces me back on track. I also broke the habit of watching too much television several years ago. I watched a minute or so of daytime TV today as I was waiting for a yoga tape to start and it was pretty unbearable. I can’t believe I would have watched for hours years ago.
Now, if I could only get into the habit of taking a daily vitamin as my doctor has recommended …
September 2nd, 2008 at 11:46 am
I know Gail views savings as a habit and I know why she says that, but I set up an automatic savings plan and an automatic RRSP contributions. I do nothing on a REGULAR basis (other than check if the amount grew) and adjust investments as needed). I do not consider the approach a habit, because I set it up ONCE.
I do believe in saving while paying off debt. I know I wrote this before, but just because you have debts does not mean you will not loose your job, get pregnant, etc. Having that money available is a great relief because it provides some freedom.
The tough habit is to spend within your means! Having a savings plan is almost independent of controlling your spending. KEEPING TRACK oif your expenses (and savings) ARE habits because you are actively choosing to do them.
Keep on savin’!
September 2nd, 2008 at 12:22 pm
One habit I have tried to maintain is everytime I get a raise instead of increasing my cost of living to what I make. I take the pay increase and put it toward one of my goals. The main reason is that you never miss what you haven’t had. As someone else noted I wish one of my good habits was working out at the gym. I will do good for awhile and then my schedule will get messed up and then it takes weeks for me to start going again.
September 2nd, 2008 at 5:14 pm
Jo, my best habit is getting up early. I started when the kids were really little so I could work before they got up. I’m still an early riser: awake by 4 up by 5 (although this summer I slept in some). I am working on a habit right now… although I don’t know if it’s so much a habit as a way of being. I’m trying to stay in the moment, live in the present, focus on what I’m doing as I’m doing it. This year I made a resolution to be the stone in the river, and it’s taking some effort. But it is working. And things that would have driven me nuts previously aren’t. I’m learning to recognize if it is something I can do something about or not. And I’m learning to give things a little time — patience is a virtue — to see how it shakes out. I guess my new habit is breathing purposely.