Student Savings

Q & A

Different Money Personalities

My husband and I watch Til Debt Do Us Part religiously and I have a question I never see answered. We are very well off for our age but we have separate bank accounts. My question for you is, can this work when our incomes are so different? And if we have children?

My husband inherited our apartment and we owe nothing on the mortgage. He makes 52000$ a year and I make about 35000 but I also receive about 10000$ from family dividends each year.

Our work ethics are also very different and I find we fight a lot about that. I believe good things come to those who work hard and he's all about relaxing and punching out right on time. I make quite a bit less than him and work 3 times harder. It's very frustrating. We split everything in half bill-wise and I have learnt from my mum that we are equals and that I believe is fair. My husband was an only child and doesn't understand sharing. Do you think we can survive this rift with separate bank accounts, and living this way?

I have no debt, maybe under 1000$ and He has about 10000$. we are both shopaholics except I buy clothes and he buys vehicles or really big ticket items. He says he likes living in debt. All I want to do is save. Every year we go to Mexico on our line of credits and then I get money from my dividends and it gets paid off. I would like to save that money... Please help me! What do you think?

Thank you!

Name withheld

I think you two need to sit down and have a serious conversation about your life’s goals, your approaches to money and how you’re going to get through the rest of your lives together. Here’s what else I think:

If he’s pulling his weight financially, why does it bug you that he doesn’t work as hard as you do? That’s your problem, not his. If he wasn’t pulling his weight, that’d be a different story.
Splitting the bills 50/50 works well for some couples. And since he’s taken care of the housing issue for you, (I’m assuming you have no mortgage from what you said) then your arrangement seems fair.
You have far less debt than he does and he needs to figure out why he’s going into debt. If, as you say, you feel you are well off, why are either of you spending more money than you make? Just greedy?
If you pay for the vacation from your dividends, does that mean you’re footing the whole bill? How come? With a lower salary, you should be splitting this bill (at the very least) too. And what’s with putting it on your line of credit and paying it back. Skip a year of holidays, save up the money and pay for it in cash next year so you don’t have any interest costs.
How do you plan on handling the whole “when we have kids” issue? Who will stay home? Who will assume the financial burden for the family? How will you divvy up home responsibilities?
And how well insured are you? If one or the other were to get sick, could you live on the other person’s income? If not, you need some insurance.

That should give you enough to think about for now. Write again, if you need more thought provoking questions.